battery died, nothing works anymore

[cortez]

Hi, my battery died on my 530i while I was away for a few days. When I got back I replaced it for a new one. Now everythings gone strange, Trip computer keeps lying to me, interior lights stopped working, washer jets packed in, LCD display on instrument cluster goes black when engine is running! Help please, its starting to p*** me off. thanks for reading

[632 Regal]

sounds like low voltage issues, charge the battery then run the car and check running voltage and when the car is off. Could be the alternator/voltage regulator/diode issues.

[bmwkamal]

hi.some time ago i had a common problem.going to workshops even to autorised bmw service don't help.first i changed my battery even that dont solve the problem.after a few days it repaired itself you know like a human.

[BigKriss]

Sounds like your car is frigged. Love from the intoxicated OZ E34 crew. Sorry we can't help you.
Big Kriss/GJP inAU/Rob101/Bimmerman/Wingman/Genphreak/Phil has just left, Romus is on the way/John 535/ Boom n Zoom/ Mattyb/Zeuk is not here (ha ha ha I bet you wish you were here Bo).

[sKilled]

I had a similar problem - as Regal said, check the voltage whilst running the engine. Do a quick search on the forum for optimal volt values. It could be your alternator is buggered. Get a DMM (digital multimeter), especially with a temp. feature (check jaycar, as they are in the US, AU and NZ area and have wicked deals). The temp feature comes in handy.
Yeah, so check the voltage (I think it's supposed to be around 14 volts with engine running).

[fukem5]

If you run a check on the negative voltage distributer you may find that the positive relay is cooked. I did this on my works ///M race car and this was my problem. I called the factory and they were of the same opinionz as I was. My Co2 relay sensor was kaput so I changed it for the DME positive negative relay sensor. It allowed me continue my race until I was able to win (as usualz), and then in the pitz I did the fixez. You may have suxess as I did. You should pm me before posting as I alwayz can fix things.

Your friend FUKem5