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632 Regal
08-14-2006, 04:38 PM
CNN INTERVIEW

A female CNN journalist heard about a very old Jewish man who had
been going to the Western Wall to pray, twice a day, every day, for a long,
long time. So she went to check it out.

She went to the Western Wall and there he was walking slowly up to
the holy site. She watched him pray and after about 45 minutes, when he
turned to leave, using a cane in a very slow fashion, she approached him for
an interview.

"I'm Rebecca Smith from CNN. Sir, how long have you been coming to
the Western Wall and praying?"

"For about 60 years."

"60 years! That's amazing! What do you pray for?"

"I pray for peace between the Christians, Jews and the Musl ims. I
pray for all the hatred to stop and I pray for all our children to grow up
in safety and friendship."

"How do you feel after doing this for 60 years?"

"Like I'm talking to a ****in' wall."

632 Regal
08-14-2006, 04:49 PM
This happened some time ago just outside a little town in the Ozark
country of Arkansas, and while it sounds like an Alfred Hitchcock tale -
It's real.

This guy was on the side of the road hitchhiking on a real dark night in
the
middle of a thunder storm. Time passed slowly and no cars went by. It was
raining so hard he could hardly see his hand in front of his face.

Suddenly he saw a car moving slowly, approaching and appearing ghostlike
in
the rain. It slowly crept toward him and stopped.

Wanting a ride real bad the guy jumped in the car and closed the door,
only
then did he realize that there was nobody behind the wheel. Then the car
slowly started moving and the guy was terrified, too scared to think of
jumping out and running.

The guy saw that the car was slowly approaching a sharp curve, still too
scared to jump out, he started to pray and begging for his life; he was
sure
the ghost car would go off the road and in the marsh and he would surely
drown, when just before the curve, a hand appeared through the driver's
window and turned the steering wheel, guiding
the car safely around the bend.

Paralyzed with fear, the guy watched the hand reappear every time they
reached a curve. Finally the guy, scared to near death, had all he could
take and jumped out of the car and ran to town. Wet and in shock, he went
into a bar and voice quavering, ordered two shots of whiskey, then told
everybody about his supernatural
experience.

A silence enveloped and everybody got goose bumps when they realized the
guy
was telling the truth and not just some drunk.

About half an hour later two guys walked into the bar and one says to the
other: "Look Bubba, There's that idiot who rode in our car when we was
pushing it in the rain."

GJPinAU
08-14-2006, 06:44 PM
Three strangers strike up a conversation in the* airport passenger*lounge in Calgary Alberta , while awaiting their* respective flights.

One is an American Indian passing through from Lame*Deer.

Another is a Cowboy on his way to Lethbridge for a*livestock show.

The third passenger is a fundamentalist Arab*student, newly arrived*at the University of*Calgary from the Middle East .

Their discussion drifts to their diverse cultures.
Soon, the two Westerners learn that the Arab is a devout, radical*MusIim and the* conversation falls into an uneasy lull.

The cowboy leans back in his chair, crosses his*boots on a magazine*table and tips his big sweat-stained hat forward over his face. The wind outside is blowing tumbleweeds around, and the old windsock is*flapping; but still no plane comes.

Finally, the American Indian clears his throat and softly he speaks,

"At one time here, my people were many, but sadly, now we are few."

The Muslim student raises an eyebrow and leans forward, "Once my** people were few," he sneers, "and now we are many.Why do you suppose that is?"

The Alberta cowboy shifts his toothpick to one side of his mouth and*from the darkness beneath his Stetson says in a smooth drawl,

"That's 'cause we ain't played Cowboys and MusIims yet, but I do*believe it's a-comin'."

HDhandyman
08-14-2006, 11:19 PM
Jeff, these are great, but I'm thinking that I'm tired of text jokes, it loses something in the delivery. Since this is your attempt to reinfuse the joke archives, why don't you try something different. You can get one of those Skype mics or whatever for 20 bucks. Why not use one to record the jokes and post em for us...I'm sure somebody has web space for you!

Just a thought.

632 Regal
08-15-2006, 12:24 AM
like you guys want me to read these out loud into a mic? i cant even read yet!!! I can figure someone to sign you up if you want tho.


Jeff, these are great, but I'm thinking that I'm tired of text jokes, it loses something in the delivery. Since this is your attempt to reinfuse the joke archives, why don't you try something different. You can get one of those Skype mics or whatever for 20 bucks. Why not use one to record the jokes and post em for us...I'm sure somebody has web space for you!

Just a thought.

HDhandyman
08-15-2006, 08:02 AM
like you guys want me to read these out loud into a mic? i cant even read yet!!! I can figure someone to sign you up if you want tho.


I don't get what you just said..."sign you up"...? Anyway, I really think you should give this a try. Just memorize the joke routine, and say em into the mic to record. Give it a try, man. We'd all get a kick out of it.:D

Espen
08-15-2006, 08:25 AM
haha, yeah i like that idea. I have a lot of web space for you.
bimmer.info jokes podcast?