Alarm/Keyless entry problems!

[rockyfeller]

I have had that popular problem that many of you have......Being unable to disarm the alarm with the remote fob in a open parking lot or in cold weather. (For some reason in my garage or in the summer it ALWAYS works) I haven't been using the alarm, but someone borrowed my car the other day and inadvertently armed the alarm. Sitting for hours we couldn't disarm it. The alarm went off so many times it killed the battery. Sadly the only place that could probably get to the root of an electonic problem is the stealer, so I had the car towed there. I KNOW THE STEALER HAS TO BE PULLING MY LEG!!! He says they can't find a root cause for the problem except for a main control module for the computer that could be causing this. Already he has overcharged me $220 for the new battery, plus maybe another $300 diagnostic charges. Now he wants $265 for the module plus labor!!! I got so irritated so I asked to just disconnect the whole alarm system. Is it possible to make the alarm non-functional while retaining keyless entry? Are there any aftermarket alarm systems which are compatible with our remote fobs? How about an alarm with auto-start, express windows/sunroof feature? (This works on my car with just the key...not the remote) If I need to buy a whole new alarm/keyless entry/auto-start system, who makes the best one?

[JonE]

I think they can program just about anything that is programmable. When I got my simple after market remote entry, they asked me if I wanted something else programmed on the "extra" button. Remote entry with two fobs was about $100.

[rockyfeller]

HELP! I'm being taken hostage by the stealer! Well he assumes I am the normal ignorant nieve BMW owner and says that my alarm is hardwired into the general module and therefore can't be deactivated. (apparently some 94 models are like this and other pre-94 models and 525i are not like this he says). The alarm has to be intact and operational for the general module to work. Now to get this new alarm module will be $265 plus about $300 labor including all the diagnostic charges etc. Add in a new battery and tax and we're talking over $900!!!!!!!!!!!!! FOR AN ALARM SYSTEM PROBLEM??? and I have to wait till Thurs! I AM SOOOOOO FRUSTRATED!! I could have bought a new set of type #5s for that money. My car is mechanically perfect....1 little electrical gremlin and my car has been rendered a useless hostage to the dealer. Urrgh!!! Please tell me someone out there has any suggestions!?!?!? Has anyone deactived/disconnected their alarm system on their car?

[rockyfeller]

Hey Jon, dealer tells me that an aftermarket alarm can be wired in only if there was no previous factory alarm....Did you have the factory alarm previously?

[bimmerd00d]

little tip about batteries, they last longer when cold, work better when hot. Next time you are in the lot, blow hot breath on the keyfob for a while, or hold it in your palm for a bit before.

[JonE]

Hey Jon, dealer tells me that an aftermarket alarm can be wired in only if there was no previous factory alarm....Did you have the factory alarm previously?
Nope, no factory alarm in my '90 535i. What a ripoff, man! Sorry, I don't know enough about your car/year to help much. That would piss me off too.
Jon

[rockyfeller]

I have tried everything with that damn remote...disassmebled it so many times that the screws are threaded....no loose contacts, new remote battery, I blew on it, threw it, ate it....It just works when it wants to....And now it has decided to work nevermore...that is... until I spend $900. And that's for keeping my old alarm and remote and living with the possiblity this could happen again next year. (or at that point the whole alarm system itself will decide not to work) Somebody tell me I can yank the daym alarm system and throw it in the woods!?! Because of ignition kill my car is not cooperating. I just want my car back! Daym alarm system!!

[ejhiggins]

i had the same problem last summer, same agravation with the dealer, pull the rear seat bottom cushion and look on the driver side there should be a black fuse box it has 2 10mm nuts holding it pull it out and you will get access to the alarm module it has a couple of fuses and relays, with the alarm beeping pull the fuses(not the relays) one by one (i don't remember wich one disables the alarm) until it stops,that will disable the alarm and the on board computer but your power locks will still work and so will everything else , then find the cheapest place buy the new module and install it yourself, if teh new one needs to be reprogamed it should cost only one hour of labor and yeahh the stealer is the only place that does that. hope this helps

[Qsilver7]

No one has actually described their systems...and the e34 has several different ones. Rocky, you probably have the BMW/Alpine keyless entry system that uses the 3 button rectangular remote fob...and EJ...your 95 540 probably uses the newer EWS keyless entry system that uses the black fat rubber headed key that has the remote buttons integrated into the key head...right?

If my above assumptions are correct...then EJ's wonderful instructions are slightly incorrect. :) The BMW/Alpine head unit (or brain) is attached to the rear seat E-box...and Rocky, if you would lift your rear seat (you do know how to do this, right?) you will see the black keyless entry unit sitting on top of the rear E-box. It's very disheartening to hear of a dealer raking you over the coals for something this simple...but you can see the connections when you lift the seat...I believe the connector is green...and if you disconnect it...the system will be disconnected...and I can't think of a reason the normal central locking system would be affected by this. If the image appears below (its on cardomain & things haven't been right with them lately)...the control unit (brain) is sitting on the right atop the box.
Click this link if the image doesn't appear: http://memimage.cardomain.net/member_images/7/web/739000-739999/739005_10_full.jpg
http://memimage.cardomain.net/member_images/7/web/739000-739999/739005_10_full.jpg

Just this past week my remote fob stopped working...I thought to check the battery even though the LED still would illuminate. When I opened the fob...I noticed that the chip wasn't sitting correctly in its holder...I snugged it back in and VOILA...back in business. You may want to check that your chip is seated properly. Once again, if the image doesn't appear...click the URL address. Remember that the holder (#2 in the diagram) slides forward to release the chip (#3)...so make sure the chip is being held securly by the holder.
(The correct diagram to look at is the top one.): http://memimage.cardomain.net/member_images/7/web/739000-739999/739005_25_full.jpg
http://memimage.cardomain.net/member_images/7/web/739000-739999/739005_25_full.jpg

Good luck...and I'm sorry that you've missed the past discussions on replacement batteries. You could have purchased a Duralast 49D battery from AutoZone for about $69, or the Interstate MTP-93 for around $83, or the Douglas BAT 95R6 battery sold by Batteries Plus for a bit over $100 (Douglas is the mfg of the OE BMW battery). All of these batteries come with enough power and cold cranking amps etc...plus they have 7 & 8 year warranties with 2 yr free replacement. You paid how much? (OUCH!) :D

Here's some images of the Duralast 49D battery:
http://memimage.cardomain.net/member_images/1/web/433000-433999/433594_219_full.jpg
http://memimage.cardomain.net/member_images/1/web/433000-433999/433594_219_full.jpg

http://memimage.cardomain.net/member_images/1/web/433000-433999/433594_220_full.jpg
http://memimage.cardomain.net/member_images/1/web/433000-433999/433594_220_full.jpg

[rockyfeller]

Yes I do have that key w/the rubber remote buttons, just like some of the newer E36s ... I thought EWS was on the newer 95 E34s, mine is a 94 model manufactured in 1993. See I too thought it was as easy as disconnecting the power supply or fuse. But I got a 2nd opinion from another dealer who told me the exact same thing....The alarm is hard-wired and integral to a general module. This module controls various other systems in the car and the alarm needs to be fully operational for this module to work properly. The general module has been fried supposedly because of my aftermarket stereo head-unit (I have a hard time believing that!) But get this! Here's the update....He says now that the new module is installed, he can now go ahead and disable the alarm somehow so it won't give me problems....so WHAT THE HECK am I paying $900 for then??? There were no other systems affected by this "general module" fault in the 1st place. I though this was done to fix the alarm. If I were to spend this amount I would want everything fixed for good. Now he tells me that the alarm won't be fixed but the module will be. I'm bout ready to break some bones. And I always originally planned on getting a better made, warrantied battery. I know all about batteries. Could have gotten a DieHard International installed myself, but because the car got towed to the dealer totally helpless and dead, they needed a battery then and there to start diagnosing the problem. I had no choice, I couldn't just come there with a battery and wrench and install it in their garage. This has been my worst nightmare because I have another shop that is fantastic and will handle any mechanical problem for half the dealer's cost. With this electrical problem it seems the dealer is the only one who can help me.

[Qsilver7]

...Yes I do have that key w/the rubber remote buttons, just like some of the newer E36s ... I thought EWS was on the newer 95 E34s, mine is a 94 model manufactured in 1993...

The 525i/530i/535i up to 95 model years did not use the black rubber headed key...they use either key #s 2-6 or key #s 14-17. The 94/95 540i uses key #7 up to mfg date 12/94...from mfg date 01/95-on...the 540i uses key #18.

See the e34 key diagrams at the following link:
http://www.realoem.com/bmw/showparts.do?model=HE63&mospid=47410&prod=19931200&btnr=41_0044&hg=41&fg=40

Sorry for the confusion. :(

[biondani]

I know the feeling. I have a UK 1991 525i Sport. It has the alarm with the rectangular fob with the corner missing, a single button. Ever since my car battery died the alarm has stopped functioning.

The stealer gave me a new programmed remote for 50 ukp, but was unable to program it. He quoted me 600 ukp for a full new alarm plus another 400 or so fitting. Apparently the old units are on a 4-5 month back order and still no guarantee it would work. All for a dead car battery.

Ian

[rockyfeller]

don't apologize at all...I appreciate your sincere efforts and suggestions to get to the bottom of WHatThefreak is goin on with my car....Well I went to pick it up from Mr Stealer, who can't work on it till Monday because of holidays. Right now power locks are working but keyless/alarm are deactivated for now. He left me the old module to display on my mantle. My OBC is out of comission... and my car is shifting funny...oh did I mention he has my credit card number as a temporary collateral hostage now to make sure I trade my car back as hostage on Monday again? Why my dear little 540i, why did you have to have an ELECTRICAL problem out of everything? I could have fixed up any other boo-boo myself.

[Schwin]

don't apologize at all...I appreciate your sincere efforts and suggestions to get to the bottom of WHatThefreak is goin on with my car....Well I went to pick it up from Mr Stealer, who can't work on it till Monday because of holidays. Right now power locks are working but keyless/alarm are deactivated for now. He left me the old module to display on my mantle. My OBC is out of comission... and my car is shifting funny...oh did I mention he has my credit card number as a temporary collateral hostage now to make sure I trade my car back as hostage on Monday again? Why my dear little 540i, why did you have to have an ELECTRICAL problem out of everything? I could have fixed up any other boo-boo myself.

Hello! First time here, my first post.
I have a 1995 540i
I cannot say for sure if this is the solution to your problem but it sound like you are having the very same problem I was having for three year. Sometime my remote key would work and sometimes it would not, sometime the system would even go off all by itself if it was armed. Most often when it was cold outside so I stopped using it. I tried everything I could think of but sell the car. Then one day the alarm got engaged accidentally it was cold outside, every time I’d try to start the car the alarm would go off, the key would not disengage it, it was like the key was dead, did nothing, new battery nothing. To make a long story short I pulled every fuse out from under the backseat that I thought could have anything to do with the alarm circuitry. Upon very close inspection of each fuse I found one that was bad not burnt it looked fine but as I was testing it and squeezing the contact prongs together in and out the tester would show open, depending on how I moved the prongs around. It was one of the 7.5 amps central locking system fuses, on my car #33. If you pull one of them out you will see your key will not work just as if the battery in it was dead. If you look at these fuses real close you will see the fuse filaments are crimped. I honestly never thought this could happen with one of these fuses but it happened to me. Everything is working fine now.

[rockyfeller]

Hmm interesting....Under the rear seat is where a lot of this stuff supposedly is; where though? Because I've searched and I see the battery/wires on the passenger side. On the driver's side, there is a black box on which a fuse directory is labeled....but where are the fuses? I have 2 slide out unpluggable boards and I opened both of them...Once I did, the car's electrical system totally shut down. One was black containing some circuit board but no fuses. The other contained a lot of complicated brass coils and what looked like some type of power distrubution/controller....Are either of these the general module? Where is the infamous fusebox?

[Javier]

of what you have under the seat.

http://www.bimmernut.com/~billr/images/rear%20fuses.jpg

The general module is the one with the circuit board.

Javier